Guiding Good Goodbyes

When someone is grieving, you may not always know what to do or how to help them. Each person deals with their grief differently and may need different things from those who support them. At Wing-Bain Funeral Home, we want people to get the support they need whether it is from our staff or from people in their personal lives. This list may be helpful when you’re wondering how you can help your grieving friend. Respect their process: even if someone’s grief journey does not align with your expectations or experiences, it’s important to understand that their coping mechanisms are different. Offer specific help: it’s easy tell someone, “Let me know if you need anything” but those who are grieving usually don’t know what they need. It may be more helpful to offer something direct, for example “can I get you any groceries?” or “are there any errands I can run for you?” Listen and be patient: allow your grieving friends to express their feelings without giving any judgement. Grief can be a long process for some, so be understanding and provide support when you can. Don’t rush or pressure them: there is no fixed time for healing, so allow your friend to take the time that they need. Avoid pressuring them to talk if they’re not ready, and try to comfortable with silence. Don’t disappear: being supportive to your friend even after the initial shock is gone and the funeral is over is important. The weeks and months following a funeral are often the hardest, and this when your friend needs you the most. Don’t compare: every loss hurts and each grief is different. Comparing situations can minimize someone’s pain and complicate their grief. Instead, try working on being there for them and allowing them to process things as they need. People never get over their grief, they just learn to manage it. They often lean on the people around them for support, and to give them the best support you can patience and compassion are key.